I have my fair share of problems, imperfections, annoying attributes....whatever you want to call them. One of these reared it's ugly head today. It is my desperate need to be in control of every situation.
I despise tax season and the dreaded preparation of our income tax return (even as easy as turbo tax makes things). Four years ago, I made the proclamation that calculating our taxes had gotten more complicated than we could handle and sent them to an accountant. I have done so every year since. Poof! My dreaded tax preparation problem is solved. Nope, not so much. Here is the scenario that faces me every year (including yesterday and into today):
Matt: Do we have everything we need to send to Snuffleupagus in order to get the taxes done? (You read correct. Big Bird's best friend, Snuffy, from Sesame Street. The name he has so graciously bestowed upon our accountant. There's a back-story for another post.)
Me: Ummm... I think so. I just need to organize it for him.
Matt: I'll take care of the boys. Go gather it together and we can take it to him this week.
Me: I'll look at it tomorrow.
Matt: Just do it now and then we'll have it done.
Me: ok....(Now imagine me going to my office, head hung low, sorting through a pile of papers and mail. I start piecing it all together and then decide that since I have it all here I might as well quickly "guesstimate" what our return will show. Wait "guesstimate"? No, I better just calculate it to the penny. My way of checking the accountant's work. Seriously.
Yes. What was supposed to be a ten minute document gather turned into two days of tax preparation. So really, problem not solved. I didn't press send and electronically mail the return off to the IRS. Instead, I'll take all of the documentation to the accountant tomorrow. He can perform the work he is professionally paid to do, and will most likely come up with a number that is right on par with the number I calculated from the same pile of papers. More likely, he will find a minute item I forgot and I will feel justified in sending our taxes his way. The cycle will then be complete, until next year when it will surely repeat itself.
As if taxes aren't bad enough, I thought it would make the experience a little more fun if we threw some potty training boot camp into the mix.
Yesterday, I woke up feeling that it was the day to start actively potty training R.
I have no answers. Seriously, he gave me no signs. We were running low on diapers and I didn't want to buy anymore. My great fix: Potty Train him. No diapers means he'll have to start using the potty all of the time. (See he is great about using it some of the time, when he wants to. Really there is no rhyme or reason as to when he will or will not use the potty. I totally can not figure it out.)
We are now approximately 30 hours into the task. My need to control keeps telling me to forge ahead, but some setbacks are leading me the other direction. Poor thing....sigh. We gave it everything we had. Even though I feel like we have failed...Out of the mouth of Matt just seconds ago: "We didn't fail and we are not giving up. We are just postponing.".
That is why I love him so much. I have an amazing husband who loves me even when I say things that I don't mean. He has been home since Thursday afternoon. This was due to inclement weather and his office picking President's day as one of their flex holidays. Although I value every second I have him here with me, I may be guilty of telling him that I didn't ever want him to work from home. I know. That sounds terrible. I can't believe it as I type it.
Wait. Do you remember all I just typed about above? Add a screaming "Plus One" to the scenario. This all was happening as the words exited my mouth. Need I say more? Probably not, but I will.
What I meant was that I think we (and all couples) benefit from some time away from each other. I think it makes us value our time together even that much more.
What I meant was that I think the Man I married thrives at work, on a job-site, making sure everything flows perfectly inside and out. The fruit of your labor puts food on our table...a Blessing which I thank God for everyday. Not only that, you get something a lot of people don't with their work. A true physical end result that everyone can see. It must be amazing to say: Because of me, this building stands. The space you are spending countless hours on right now will one day serve a huge purpose. HOPE for people with cancer. You are amazing and I can't even begin to imagine how you balance it all.
What I meant was that you are wonderful.
That is what I meant. I love you.